Wednesday, November 14, 2012

I can't stand very traditional Chinese people even though I'm ethnically Chinese myself

I can't stand very traditional Chinese people even though I'm ethnically Chinese myself?
So my parents are immigrants from mainland China (Shanghai), and they are as stereotypically Chinese as you can get. When I was a kid I was forced to play the piano and would get locked out of the house late at night if I messed up a song too many times in a row. In the 2nd grade, I was really happy because I got an A on a test. I came home, told my parents, and they asked me if it was the highest grade in the class. I said no, one girl named Margaret got a score 2% higher than me. I got yelled at, told I was useless trash, I brought shame to the family, etc, that one day Margaret would grow up to be successful and I wouldn't. They never even MET Margaret before, but after that every time I said i got an A they would immediately follow it with "What did Margaret get?" and if Margaret got the SAME grade as me, 100%, they would still be annoyed that I didn't do better. There was an advanced class in my elementary school that you had to score higher than 90% on every subject to get into. My math scores were high enough, but my English scores were weaker since my parents spoke a different language at home and I didn't socialize in school. I didn't get placed in the advanced class, and my mom would go to the school and yell at the people on the main office. Then she would come home and yell at me, and even hit me for it. Margaret DID get into the class and so my parents would always say I embarrassed the family by being dumber than Margaret, even though they had never even MET Margaret. I got hit and even beaten for my grades through high school. Meanwhile, my parents would call their friends to ask what grades their friends' kids got, and if their friends' kids got higher scores than me I'd get yelled at too even if we weren't in the same class. But if the friends' kids didn't got lower scores, my parents would laugh about it together and say how stupid someone else's kid was. I even got yelled at once because my dad's friend's kid received an award from her elementary school. I said she was a year younger than me and they didn't have that award the year before when I was at the school, and my dad said that if I were really a good student, they would have MADE UP an award to give to me. I got slapped and even beaten for my grades a lot. My mom sent me to school once with a 102 degree fever because I "couldn't miss a day of school" and yelled at the school nurse because the school nurse wouldn't let me go back to class and affect the other students. Traditionally Chinese people act like this all the time, when I was little all the Chinese parents were equally crazy. I hate Chinese people so much that if I see Chinese parents with a kid, I feel sorry for the kid. I want to adopt a little kid from China one day to defend her from being raised by crazy Chinese people. Anyone else have crazy Chinese parents that they hate? Yes I am aware that not ALL Chinese people like this, but I'm saying it's part of the culture to be crazy. I don't hear Americans holding superstitions involving red ink or words that sound alike or call each other over the phone to compare their kids' grades and then yell at their kids for being useless and being a shame to the family when hanging up.
Philosophy - 3 Answers
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1 :
oh my god, you poor sod! most parents would be proud of you...
2 :
While it's true that Chinese culture is harsh when it comes to parents' appreciation of work and good grades, you have to know that--like all regular parents--your parents love you. I suffered throughout high school, where math was simply not my forte subject, and my parents were constantly on my back about it. However, when I got older, I realized that the pressure they put on me had helped me appreciate myself more. I learned to know myself when I had truly done my best and what grades to consider "acceptable". I thank my parents today for the way they were on my back because they helped me reach the success I've found today. Push through it and just do YOUR best. I know your parents' approval may be important to you but you must appreciate yourself first :)
3 :
I despise most old white people and I'm white so your issue isn't unique. I feel similar to you when these old people harp on the good old days where they trusted the government and they believe they should honor your debts and stuff like that. Seriously, trust the government I shouldn't even have to point out the stupidity in that one and the banks and our whole economic system as a whole are such a scam that only a brainwashed old person would just randomly give all your money to some bank regardless of how much your getting ripped off under some misguided notion of "honor". If the old people I'm talking about had any honor they wouldn't have allowed thugs in business suits to take over our economic system and set up a debt slavery system, not to mention the things like Tonkin Bay. How many peoples lives were ruined by Vietnam? I'm actually torn on whether I'd rather see the stuff your talking about or obnoxious stupidity of the old white people.




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